What the world needs now is love, sweet love
Hate is a strong word. It is an equally strong emotion. However calm, reasonable, or loving you consider yourself, you have probably experienced it at some point in your life. It may have been a quick flash of anger and hatred for someone who inconvenienced you at a really bad time. Or it could be a long and festering wound in your heart for something you felt deeply hurt you.
Whatever your story is, hate is not something you want to hold on to. It is not only the ugliest but also the unhealthiest of emotions that we are capable of. If you are not careful, it will consume you and turn you into a bitter person.
Now more than ever, the world is desperate for some love. Love for each other, for the animals and for the earth itself. And it all starts with figuring out how to stop hating someone. Well, let us dive right into it and see what causes such intense negativity and how you can free yourself of the burden.
The burden of hate
What many of us do not realize about hate is that it is not just a short-term emotion. It leaves a huge impact in our lives long after we get over the hurt feelings and anger associated with it. And the longer you hold on to it, the worse the effects that you will have to deal with as a result.
Some of the long term effects of hate include:
- Disintegration of other relationships
- Reduced overall functionality
What the Bible says
Unsurprisingly, the Bible does not focus too much on hatred as a direct theme. Instead, the spotlight is on love and how we can use it to change our lives and those of others around us. There are, of course, several texts that directly address hatred. Let’s take a look at a couple of them.
“Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice”Ephesians 4:31
“Hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers all wrongs”Proverbs 10:12
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For every one of these texts there are countless others talking about love and its power. This is because after all is said and done, the absolute best way to fight hatred is by embracing the light and positivity that is brought about by love. So if you are trying to figure out how to stop hating someone who hurt you then you now know where to start, love.
How to stop hating someone who hurt you
There is clearly a lot at stake when it comes to dealing with feelings of hatred. Not only does it pose a danger to your mental and emotional health, but it is also a requirement from God that we swap it for love. To help you get on the right path, here is how to stop hating someone.
1. Accept your feelings
One of the biggest enemies of progress when it comes to dealing with hatred is denial. The truth is that it is sometimes embarrassing to accept that you feel like you hate someone. You may feel like they are not worth the energy and refuse to accept your feelings.
By taking the opposite approach and acknowledging your anger and hurt feelings you will be in a better position to move forward with a clear head.
2. Learn how to forgive
The best way to stop hating someone who hurt you: Just let it go. The reality is that whether it was a small wrong or a great injustice there is not much that can be done to reverse it. So free yourself of the burden of hatred and learn to forgive. This does not mean that you condone the actions of those who hurt you. It just means that your peace of mind matters more to you.
3. Open up about what hurt you
Do not let your anger simmer inside of you. It never ends well. It will lead to toxic feelings and bitterness which only makes matters worse. Instead, find someone who offers an emotional safe space and rant about it. In fact if it is possible just confront the object of your hatred and let them know that they hurt you.
4. Don’t take things too personally; even when they are
A lot of hatred stems from anger. A lot of anger stems from misunderstanding. Therefore, one of the best ways to deal with hatred is by taking things easy. Try your best to give the benefit of the doubt. And if it was obviously intentional harm to you then look at it as it being a problem on their side and not yours.
5. Get another perspective
While we are on the topic of misunderstandings, you may want to get a different perspective when dealing with how to stop hating someone who hurt you. In your head you might see yourself as the one on the right, but a new perspective could change your mind and soften your heart.
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6. Let go and mean
It is not enough just to forgive. You actually have to let go of those negative feelings and not just by word of mouth. No one expects you to move from hate to absolute adoration overnight. But at the very least be willing to take the necessary steps to actually move away from the toxic emotions.
7. Take it to the Lord in prayer
Dealing with hatred is not an easy fight. It is a strong emotion that will fight hard to stay put in your heart. God is truly the best person to fight this fight for you as the very author of love itself. So ask Him for help.
Go forth and spread love
There is so much hatred simmering in the bowels of our earth. Whether it is at a personal level or more of a negative community effort, it is something that definitely needs to be stumped out before it consumes us all. So take all you have learnt from the scriptures and our 8 tops on how to stop hating someone and use it to free yourself of the toxic load.